Nothing Says Thanksgiving Like A Little Looting

Thanksgiving has many traditions.  Stuffing, pie, watching the Detroit Lions lose.  These are all rituals that we, as Americans, hold near and dear.  Central to that holiday is also the idea of gratitude, of setting aside some time to sit back and reflect on that for which we have to be grateful.  And don’t forget, looting.

Yes, that’s right, looting.  Yesterday in the oh-so-posh neighborhood of Soho in Manhattan, patriotic and grateful Americans expressed their sense of gratitude by looting a Hollister store after a crowd gathered outside realized that they would not be opening their doors at the stroke of midnight, in observance of the even more sacrosanct holiday of Black Friday.  The assembled shoppers assumed that the store would be open, and much to their chagrin/outrage, it did not do so as they had anticipated.  So, they did the only thing that any sane, level headed American would do.  They broke into it, and helped themselves to as much of the merchandise as their fat little arms could haul off.

This would disgust me if it didn’t strike me as so idiotic, prompting me to take a more reflective view of the situation.  There’s a cultural sickness in this country, and its big day on the calendar is Black Friday.



  1. You don’t understand. Those skinny jeans make my ass look really good. I needed them ASAP!

    People will loot a store for clothes yet continue to complain about the government screwing them over and do nothing about it. If we put half our effort into something valuable…


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